Schadenfreude is wrongly deprecated. Without it, life would lose its savor.

1. Watch lame-duck Dubya being snubbed by the entire line of G20 leaders. Sure, objectively speaking it’s no skin off his ass, but I’m sure that he’d gotten to enjoy strutting around being King of the World.

2. Tom Friedman’s cash cow is dead. As of yesterday it had lost 99% of its value, and bankruptcy is now expected so it should fall lower.

While I was cursing the darkness, that poor motherfucker was lighting candle after candle — and now look at him! I’m going to completely enjoy seeing him change his tune, now that his net worth is in the low eight (or high seven) figures instead of ten.

I’ve always been a big fan of orders of magnitude. I keep a bucket of them by the desk and throw in an extra one whenever my writing seems insufficiently extreme.